Final Exams

If you don't know the course material the day before the final, then you might as well just bend over.

~ Quote by AC E-xpression

Sexy Pizza Dough

You know you have a dirty mind when . . .

 . . . all you can see is how much this resembles a butt . . .

. . . and you go and make it worse.

Yes, I'd like some balls on my pizza please!

Around UBC Campus

Hello! Yes, I'm still alive. I survived my first midterm (just barely) and I have another one next week. Here are some pictures around my school campus.

This is an outhouse located next to the trail entrance to Wreck Beach. It is very artistic

Two artistic outhouses.

University of British Columbia? More like University of Building Construction!

In a Japanese restaurant, not at UBC

Science World! Not on campus

Mount Something. I don't know which. At Steveston Village. Also not on campus.

The changing leaves. I fucking love fall.

Sauder and Quidditch

*Sigh*

Oh Sauder.

Sauder. Sauder. Sauder. You haven't changed.

In the first lecture of my Comm course on Sept 10, I eavesdropped on what people had to say in the Henry Angus building and the general consensus I got was "I can't believe they took away Frosh" and "What's the big deal?"

*Sigh*

No, they don't understand the significance just as I feared. These fucking kids are supposed to be the "business leaders of our future"?

Yeah. Fucking. Right.

Check your self-centred, cocky attitudes at the door before you graduate boys and girls. A little humbleness and reparation goes a long way in preventing you from being eaten alive in the business.

Oh well, you'll learn that soon enough.

On a happier note, I saw this sign outside the CIRS building on the first day of school on Sept 3:

I've heard that there are people who play quidditch complete with brooms and goal posts but I thought an educational institution like UBC couldn't possibly embarrass itself like that.

Turns out I was so wrong:

Holy shit, it's really real.

I see Slytherins

And just as hilariously silly as I imagined it would be.

Sauder: Same Old Shit with Bonus Under-Age Rape

WARNING: This post may be trigger-ish for former victims of rape and other violent sex crimes. This is not a happy post, people.
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If you have not yet heard of what happened during Frosh at the Sauder School of Business (Sauder) at the University of British Columbia (UBC), then please check out these articles:

http://globalnews.ca/news/825544/ubc-investigates-after-students-led-in-chant-encouraging-rape-of-underage-girls/

http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/british-columbia/story/2013/09/07/bc-ubc-frosh-pro-rape-chant.html

This is not surprising to me. At all. This type of shit has been going on for years, since at least 2005 which was when I was a freshman at Sauder. I didn't go to Frosh because my parents didn't let me. Looking back on it now, it was for a good reason because Frosh is just an excuse to party. And not just partying, but dangerous partying.

From what I heard, there was under-age drinking, and quite a bit of it. The legal age to drink in British Columbia is 19 or older. The average freshman would be 17 (if their birthday is in September-December) or 18 (if their birthday is in January-August), typical if a person goes straight into post-secondary education right after high school.

The Frosh leaders bought beer and offered it to the new students to give them a taste of what university life would be like. The new students were under no obligation to accept, but a bunch of impressionable teenagers would be highly susceptible to peer pressure, especially if it comes from a Frosh leader.

Might I just remind everyone:

"Minors are also allowed to drink under the supervision of their parents, but supervision by a non-parent adult is not sufficient."

"It is against the law to buy alcohol for those under the legal drinking age." (x)

Also, I don't know how, but the Frosh leaders in 2005 managed to get everybody into a club. Every. Single. Person. Especially the under-age ones.

So there's Frosh, and then there's orientation (ie. the first day of school). Now orientation I did attend (because it was mandatory), and I fucking hated every second of that day. My leader was useless and didn't know anything, all she did was take us around the campus and point out what buildings are which. No points of interest, no history of the school, no helpful advice about classes, and etc. We were also made to attend these pointless presentations on work-life balance from senior students and faculty who basically said, "Study hard, exercise, eat healthy, and remember, you guys are the cream of the crop."

"Cream of the crop." "The best of the best." "The top tier." "The echelon of education." These are the type of words that are used at the start of every course term to brainwash the students into thinking that they are above everybody else. What's worst is the faculty actually believes this. I understand that business is a dog-eat-dog world and you need to give your students every bit of encouragement as you can, but this is not the way to go about it.

This pervasive culture of superiority starts on day one. Freshman BComm students are taught chants about how great the Sauder is as a school, and jeers that put down equally hard-working students from other majors as if we were in India and the caste-system was in.

Students that had a major in the Arts were ridiculed as "unemployed," students from kinesiology were scoffed at as "P.E. Teachers," and any student from Science were shrugged at and sneered "we make more money than you."

I overheard part of an orientation with Science students last week and I wish I had that when I was a freshman. The leader really knew her stuff and told her group what the emergency blue posts mean and that if you press the button, UBC SafeWalk will come help you. Also, if you are getting chased on campus, then you press the button on the next post so that UBC can track you and be able to tell where you are going and send help in your immediate area.

So, this chant about Y.O.U.N.G. is nothing new; just another despicable and absolutely disgusting saying to add to the already muddied list. It's just this time, it went too far.

I'd like to comment now on how the UBC Staff are handling this situation. I've worked at the front lines where my company was the in the middle of a couple of incidents that involved the press and I have to say, UBC is doing a very shitty job.

Randy Schmidt sounds totally bored and disinterested (seriously, where did you get this guy from?) and Robert Helsley has absolutely no fucking right to hide behind the excuse of "I didn't know." Have you never taken at least some part in orientation? What kind of Dean are you? How the fuck could you not know about the chants and jeers?

In an incident similar to this whole fiasco, my company heard the smallest sound of a couple of 20-something year old guys talking about date raping 16-year-old girls or younger and there was an immediate investigation and a 911 phone call to the police. It resulted in a suspension, termination, and a subsequent ban from the premises for those two guys as well as a criminal charge.

So UBC, Sauder, and CUS, get your fucking act together and resolve this issue. Something like this should never have happened and a big university like you should know how to handle bad press a little bit better than what I have witnessed so far. You have just tarred the reputation of this school and your alumni. I am so utterly disappointed and angry. Quite frankly, I no longer feel like it's safe for me to continue my BCS here.

In high school sex ed I learned that 1 in 4 girls experience some form of sexual assault before they turn 18 whether it be harassment, or molestation, or rape, or whatever else. In case you didn't read that:

1 in 4 girls experience some form of sexual assault before they turn 18. That's 25%.

I am one of them and I was only 8.

So don't you fucking dare trivialize this issue. Do not brush this off like it's an inconvenience for you. I came back to this school because as much as I hated it the first time around, I believed that it would be better. But not even into the first week of school and the same old shit comes back to haunt me. Fuck you.

Fuck you and your fucking clique, CUS. Fuck you and your outdated and pretentious ways, Sauder. Fuck you and your money-leeching machine, UBC.

Fix this, or give me back my money!

Ace's Deep Thought on September

September 1 has come and gone which means I missed the train to Hogwarts. #foreverasquib

Summer Bugs

I've noticed that ants like to hang out in the shade cast by the front gate during the summer time. I like to step on them as I leave to go to work because it serves as a great visual when I have to deal with asshole clients.

But this little guy made me smile when I got home from work one day.

Isn't it cute? There were actually two of them on pillar. I think they were going to mate.

Speaking of mating, check out this pair of mosquitoes fucking on my front door.

I should have killed them, but I didn't because now I can say that a pair of mosquitoes fornicated on my front door and they do it ass to ass. They made me laugh and for that they get a pass.

P.S. Everyone needs to watch this video on slug sex. It's fucking beautiful.

Ace's Deep Thought on Junk

If I could charge inanimate objects rent, then I would be fucking rich. My room is like a fucking black hole because stuff comes in and never goes out. The story of my fucking life.

Vancouver Part 2

This is VanCity, yo. 

We love our trees

We have awesome ice cream

Tiramisu and hedgehog gelato

And awesome fireworks (same session as last week)

Go to DeviantArt to see .gif

Vancouver Celebration of Light 2013

I went to the Vancouver Celebration of Light on Saturday, July 27, 2013 and holy shit my pictures turned out great!

Skyfall presented by the United Kingdom

Unfortunately Blogger doesn't support .gif so you'll have to go to my DeviantArt to see the Skyfall series. Taken with Samsung Galaxy S3.

What the Hell, America?

How does 2013 Florida have a (Stand Your Ground) law that seems cut and pasted from 1881 Tombstone? Because let’s be clear here: according to current Florida law, you can get a gun, follow an unarmed minor, call the police, have them explicitly tell you to stop following them, then choose to ignore that, keep following the minor, get into a confrontation with them, and if at any point during that process you get scared, you can shoot the minor to death. And the state of Florida would say ‘Well, you did what you could.'

—	JOHN OLIVER, The Daily Show

Okay so it's not a good idea to go to America right now anymore. Especially if you're black. Aw, I guess trips to Disney World (in Orlando, Florida) is no longer an option.

And there goes my American viewers . . . Goodbye :(

UPDATE:

Oh, that's why the jury found George Zimmerman innocent.

MY NIECE

OMG U GUYZ! I HAVE SEEN THE CUTEST KID IN THE WORLD AND IT'S MY NIECE!

SHE WAS BORN ON JUNE 28 WEIGHING 9LBS 2OZ WITH A HEAD FULL OF HAIR.

I MEAN FUCKING LOOK AT THAT HAIR!!!

SHE'S 1 WEEK OLD IN THAT PICTURE. SHE'S SO NEW THAT HER SKIN IS STILL PEELING AND HER HEAD IS SHAPED LIKE AN ALIEN, BUT A VERY CUTE ALIEN.

YA FEEL ME?

Also, happy belated birthday and Freedom Day to my bestie! ('Murica!) And happy birthday to my sister from another mother and father who is currently living down under!

O Canada (A Haiku)

Happy Canada Day!

It's hotter than all balls.

I've had five hours of sleep -_-"zzzz

My Nephew

My 9-month old nephew teethed on this squishy foam ball:

We had to take away his chew toy.

Sometimes he forgets how to be a baby and thinks he's a dog instead.

This Globe, It's Fucked

Look what I found (and bought)

I've flipped through some of the pages in these books and man, how are we even still alive?

Happy fucking Friday. AC out (for the weekend)

Food Porn: Alaskan King Crab

Food porn (a definition): Images of beautiful delicious food that make you think
"I can fap to this"

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Red Star Seafood Restaurant on 8298 Granville St, Vancouver, BC makes the best Alaskan King Crab that I have ever had:

Crab legs steamed to perfection

Thin noodles cooked in Alaskan king crab juice

This picture is turned upside down. Looks like a heart shaped butt to me.

Vancouver

Just some pictures I have lying around.

Cambie and 10th Ave W - Heading north into downtown (May 2013)

Canucks bus wrap from Fall 2012

Outside the Sutton Place Hotel (March 2013)

Art at YVR in one of the outbound international terminals (Jan 2013)

Close up of art - School of fish

Mani & Pedi

I finally used my SocialShopper coupon for a mani and pedi at T&Y Spa. Try to imagine what it would have looked like right after I got my nails done because these were taken a week after my spa day.

I don't like this colour and I picked it. I don't even know what it's called.

Colour: Can't Find My Czechbook byt OPI

Night Market 2013

Hello! Yes, I'm still alive and this is my "holy shit I haven't blogged for three weeks so here's a whole week of entries to make up for it" post.

I went to the night market on June 1 and there was a stall selling supplies that would help you survive an apocalypse. I thought, "How in the hell would these things help me survive an apocalypse when I would already be dead? It's an apocalypse after all."

Look closer and you'll see...

Q: Dog spray and bear spray only? Where's the alien spray? A: Sneeze on them.

It's for a zombie apocalypse.

This year they named the night market "Magical Duck Island" after a famous night market theme in Hong Kong that I've never heard of. So how is that famous? I don't know.

P.S. -- I saw Star Trek Into Darkness and it was glorious. Don't watch it in 3D though because IMAX doesn't add anything to the film.

Wow, Really?

I haven't done grocery shopping since my parents came back from Taiwan, but I'm pretty sure 1.395kg of top sirloin steak don't normally sell at $12.30 CDN. The expiry date is still good too.

I feel like I just robbed Safeway, Jesus fucking Christ.

My New Laptop

The laptop that I need for school come September arrived last week. Yes, I just got around to posting it now.

Total = $1275.08 with a backpack (which hasn't arrived yet).

Specs:

• Model: Lenovo Thinkpad T430
• Screen: 14.0" HD and Anti-Glare (good for the long hours that I'll spend staring at the screen)
• Processor: Intel Core i5-3230M
• Operating System: Windows 7 home premium 64 (I don't like Windows 8)
• Memory: 8 GB (2DIMM)
• Hard Drive: 180GB solid state drive
• Optical device: DVD recordable

Happy humpday to me

I'ma Gonna Be Edjumacated

I got accepted into UBC for Computer Science.

I will complete this in 2 years instead of 4 because it will be my second Bachelor's degree. My first degree was in Commerce, specializing in Human Resource Management, also from UBC. 

Not bad for my 94th blog post, eh? (I may be good at math, but I never said I know how to count!)

Big thank you to my mother who will be paying for the $11,000 tuition and the $1200 laptop I ordered. 

Happy Mother's Day!

Shit Chinese People Eat: Chicken Butt

The only things we can't eat from the air, land, and sea

are planes, cars, and boats.

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I may not have sucked on any balls while I was in Taiwan, but I did eat a lot of ass.

On sticks, no less. They come deep fried, grilled, or marinated and are absolutely fucking delicious.

Yes, these little gems are made up of just skin, and fat, and bones; but be aware of the hollow shafts that lurk within. A hollow shaft (otherwise known as the calamus or the quill) is the very tip of a feather that is embedded inside the skin of a chicken. They are more commonly found in bigger butts because bigger butts have more feathers and so are more easily missed in the cleaning/plucking stage.

Just to be clear, hollow shafts are not edible -- at least, I don't think they are but I'm pretty sure I have swallowed some before. The happy news is that they won't kill you.

In any case, do enjoy this fatty, greasy, high calories, high cholesterol, heartburn and heart attack inducing snack!

Mmm, deep fried chicken butts on a stick.

Birthday Food Coma

My birthday started on April 19th with dinner at my favourite Italian restaurant.



Spinach ravioli at Zefferelli's

Then brunch on the 20th at IHOP (no pictures, sorry).

Mom made my favourite food on the 22nd.

Sauteed pork, tofu, and onions in tianmianjiang with grated cucumber and carrot

I had a free brunch at Denny's on my actual birthday (April 23)

Birthday Slam from Denny's

And a free burger

Baja burger from Vera's burger. The meat was so raw it might as well have been mooing.

For my birthday dinner, I made myself some pasta.

Homemade pasta <3

Also not pictured are 2 free drinks from Blenz (first time trying Royal Tea Latte and Belgian Dark Hot Chocolate; they're like orgasms in a cup) and the usual free birthday drink from Starbucks.

Can we just wind the clock back to a week ago so that I can experience all of that again? Much appreciated, thanks.